My Desire vs. God's Will

Have you ever struggled with knowing God's will through your desire?

He just found out, and needless to say, he was perplexed.

“Why didn’t she share this with me?” “Why am I just now finding out?” “Aren’t we supposed to be partners in life?” “Was she keeping a secret from me?” “I don’t like secrets!”

He had questions, lots of questions but I believe the most prominent one was, “Why am I finding this out after reading your Facebook post?!”

“Tell me all about it,” He asked me “I want to know all the details.”

I wasn’t trying to keep a secret, not at all. My husband is my best friend, my partner, and a highly trusted friend. I want nothing more than to share all my life with him but with this issue, I was searching for God’s will and not my own desire, it’s as simple as that.

Don’t get me wrong with what I am about to say, women don’t have that much power with influencing our men…wellll maybe we do…but I wanted to make sure that I wasn’t influencing my husband’s desires to my desires; I needed to know that God was directing him/us into His will, I was searching for confirmation that what I was feeling wasn’t me but God.

Have you ever felt torn about decisions, wondering if it’s something you want or was it the will of God? The struggle is real folks, so real that at times we miss out on the will of God because we are afraid to step out in faith or we misinterpret the desires in our heart.

Sometimes we think that having pleasure in life is not God’s plan for us, that we shouldn’t prosper or be granted perks in life. We become our own martyrs at times. When it comes to God’s plan, we think it should involve suffering or giving up things in life, our time, our finances, our future.

It’s true that we are to give our time to the Lord, but our hearts should be doing it willfully and in joy not with a feeling of sacrifice or loss. Where do we get this misconception? By not interpreting God’s word properly.

For example, John 15:12-13 (NKJV) tells us this:

“12 This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.”

We know what Jesus did for us, He became the sacrificial lamb for our sins. He died (a gruesome and horrible death) so that we may live. We take that information; we look at this verse and believe “I should do the same.” Then we realize how impossible this would be and we begin to wallow in our selfish nature. “I can’t do what Jesus did! There is no way I could go through what He did for my family or my friends! What’s wrong with me?” Then we overcompensate thinking we have to suffer for the sake of others.

Let’s set our minds at ease.

1. Jesus never asked us to become a suffering savior for others – HE is the only Savior, and He willingly gave His life for us so that we may be saved from eternal hell.

2. In this scripture the phrase to “lay down” doesn’t refer to death. It means to put down, to bend, to set aside, to establish or ordain. It literally means to be in a passive horizontal position. In other words, a straight line that is parallel to the Lord’s heart and will.

We are asked to take the time to fellowship with our family, friends & acquaintances. We are asked to be there for them, to lay aside our plans at times to show the love of Christ to someone else. We should help those in need, give to missions or to those less fortunate. We are to do what Jesus called us to do and share the Good News!

But…we are to do so with a willing and joyful heart.

When we have a heart for the Lord, He willingly provides to us what we desire deep inside our hearts. This doesn’t mean if we desire a fancy house, a high paying career, or a sports car He will provide it for us.

Maybe He will, maybe He won’t but we should take heart to know that God will provide what we need, what is good for our eternal soul, and what is profitable for HIS Kingdom.

If having that high paying career will lead us down the wrong path, then it’s not for us. If that fancy house will fill us with pride and stinginess, then that’s a door He won’t open. If that sports car brings danger down the road, He will protect us. God may close doors (opportunities) but He doesn’t lock them, meaning sometimes we break down doors that we weren’t meant to go through.

Okay, let me not stray too far from the point I’m trying to make. Sometimes we have desires deep down within our heart and we wonder “Is this my flesh or is this God’s direction?” How do we know?

1. God’s give us our desires when we delight in Him. Those desires are God’s goodness because they are within His will for us.

“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4

2. When we earnestly ask the Lord for answers, He will provide them.

“Yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.” Proverbs 2:3-5

“He fulfills the desire of those who fear him; he also hears their cry and saves them.” Psalm 145:19

3. When our heart is truly tuned into the Lord, our deepest desire is to follow His footsteps and not our own. With that said, He will direct us towards the right path and help us make good decisions – as long as we listen to His voice.

“Keep steady my steps according to your promise, and let no iniquity get dominion over me.” Psalm 119:33

Back to my story – what was it that I had kept from my husband? Well for about a year and a half I felt a call to leave Colorado and move to Tennessee.

I struggled with this desire; was it because I was homesick for the south where I grew up or was it a desire based upon the Lord’s will?

We would be leaving our grown children and our grandchildren. We would be leaving a home that we were able to build because of the graciousness of the Lord. Our backyard view is amazing and reminds us of the love God has for us, we would truly miss it. It would be a big change, a big move and frankly…there would be some financial uncertainty.

I know what scripture says but I also know I could easily misinterpret Hs word if I was focused on a fleshy desire. I went to the Lord in prayer, and this is what I said,

“Lord I feel a call towards Tennessee, and I don’t know why. Is this me or is this you? Lord I know what I want but if this is your will for us, I need YOU to put it in my husband’s heart. Doing this will give me the confirmation I need to know this is your will for us.”

A year and a half I waited, and I would be lying if I said I was okay with the fact that my husband didn’t show the same desire. I guess I expected him to wake up one day and say:

“The Lord came to me in a dream, we need to move to Tennessee!”

Just because his name is Joseph doesn’t mean he would have a ‘Joseph encounter.’ I had many moments of disappointment and depression because the desire wasn’t placed in my husband’s heart. What I didn’t consider was God had a timing. Even though the desire was in my heart, it wasn’t God’s time…YET.

Fast forward to now - we are packing up our home, we have a contract on a house in Tennessee, our current home is for sale. God used a job opportunity for my husband as a catalyst for His will. Here’s what’s interesting, this new job excites my husband because it encompasses one of his hobbies. God has also placed a ministry upon my heart for this new town we are moving to, but that’s for another “God-stance” discussion.

God is good and God is faithful.

Discerning God’s will through our desire means we search His word, we go to Him in prayer, and we follow in His footsteps being careful to follow His commands. When we do this, we know the Lord’s voice and we recognize opportunities He has laid out for us.

It’s up to us to walk towards that opportunity in faith with the assurance that He is with us.

“I delight to do your will, O my God; your law is within my heart.” Psalm 40:8

Sheri Caruso is an Author, Public Speaker and Women's Ministry leader. She is the author of Sackcloth and Ashes of the Heart and People of Presence Faith and Purpose. Both books are available on Amazon.com.

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